Lifestyle The cozy diary

who’s the face starring at me in the mirror

July 13, 2020

recently a lot of messages reached me, asking if I’d consider to do a Q&A or something similar. Some of these texts were a bit irritating. I am not, in any way, obligated to share my personal life with you. I tell you what I think you’re interested in but still is comfortable to me. however I thought about this a bit and came to the decision to tell you about some stuff most people realize when they first meet me. And a bit more.

I am, in fact, a huge nerd

this is something I’ve been told a lot.
for some reason it’s one of the first things that comes to people’s minds. However no one, including me, is quite sure what kind of nerd. I don’t play video games. yet.
i watch a lot of Movies and memorize way too much unnecessary facts about them, but still not enough to be called a cinephile.
I read all the books but I have a hard time expressing my thoughts towards people who aren’t as excited as I am about it.
Let’s just say I’m a lover of stories. fictional or not.

I “use difficult words”

My first words came out of my little mouth when I was around 2 months old. yup.
I never talked the gibberish people often associate with babies and started “collecting words” which meant I always looked fit synonyms. At the age of three I found already four words for head.
also I had a Speech impairment that made me turn every k into a t and the other way around.
On my first day of elementary school I already knew the word Decadence [and could explain + use it] but had no idea who the fuck Cinderella was. Which didn’t necessarily helped me finding friends.

when I am upset I watch volcano videos

this is something my father thought me when I was quite little and still practice. I’d be laying in my bed crying about something like friends (non existing) or had some sort of problem and the only thing that would calm me down was watching volcano videos…

I have a really hard time talking to people who are actually my age

every time I see someone who’s vaguely my age I totally panic. I don’t even know why but my brain just goes like: impress them. they have to like you. If they don’t they’ll tell everyone else about how dumb you are and you never find any friends. So if I somehow manage to talk to you, that means that I made a huge effort and I’m really putting myself out there 🙂 impress me or I’ll tell everyone else lol

I write essays for fun

… and they aren’t any good. I just research stuff about a certain topic I’m interested in and mix them all together. they’re often concerning feminism or literature but I’d never show them to anyone since I feel really anxious sharing stuff that is from big importance to me. Also I’m genuinely afraid of the impact it might have on the way you see me.

I once was sort of kidnapped by my grandma

well that heading is a bit over dramatic but it’s also kind of true. my grandma and I always had a really special relationship and when I was like six she offered my parents That she could take me for three days so that they have some alone time.
My parents agreed and left for Sweden while my grandma took me to her birthplace and showed me the town she grew up in. i was a bit homesick which she completely ignored and only reacted with jealousy when I told her I’d miss my parents. It was planned that we’d go home often two days and you cannot imagine the joy I felt on my last evening. She called my parents and came back with a sad face. She told me how much fun my parents had without me and how they’d like to stay two ,ore days without their child. Only a few months ago I found out that she told my parents I didn’t miss them at all, and I fact, actually wanted to stay with her for a bit longer.
my parents were devastated but thought I’d be happier that way while actually I cried my eyes out of my head, thinking my parents leave me forever….
ever since I struggled with enormous homesickness lol thanks grannie

I do not like public libraries

the thought of all the places where this book was before I took it with me scares the shit out of me.

I have the weirdest allergies

i can’t go to pools. I can’t eat apples. no chilies. no lemons. no Halloween makeup.
it’s really annoying but nothing I’d die of or anything. Just headaches and pimples.

hope this satisfied your curiosity :)) in case of more questions ☞ ask!!
e.

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